PATREON SUPPORTER TALE :: Katrina (or “Kat”)

Kat is a good friend of mine with a strange story that I am both unsure how to tell, and excited to share with the world.

She is from Northern Ireland. She came with her family to stay a few days in Hamilton and stayed at my residence (which was a hotel at the time). I am a bit fuzzy on why we started talking, but regardless: her and I spent hours outside talking about things. Mostly, the pains of being in a wheelchair.

She was also afflicted with something that put her in a chair most of the time. We would spend hours outside in the hot summer sun discussing various topics. Her family and I did not see eye-to-eye on the notorious “Brexit” that was going on at the time, but we never had any bad blood between us.

Over the time we spent together, we spent hours delving into stories of our pasts and killing time laughing at the ridiculous things that happened around us.

Since her departure back to the across the pond, we have kept in contact via the internet. We vent and express issues that we have in our day-to-days and keep each other entertained with the various things we have been spending our time on. She keeps me sane, most of the time, and I hope that I do the same for her. She has sent my wife and I a few things over the last year, and was one of the first to congratulate us on our wedding.


I have been doing thinking about how to go about offering things on Patreon since I opened it back up. I like doing these retrospectives on those I know, but have been dreading the idea of doing the story about dragons for the last little bit, in the event they ever happen. I think I will do chapters. Each chapter will be of equal length, and they will each contain the same level of epic-ness. I refuse to start writing them ahead of time, so even I will be heavily entertained by them when they happen. I hope you like them when they finally happen.

 

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~something worth mentioning

I revived my old Patreon page. It would be nice to make more than $1 CDN to write this thing on a mostly-weekly basis. If you feel like throwing a little something-something my way, please use the link up above or right here in the text of this update.

For those of you who remember, I used to link it in everything I wrote. You do not have to worry: I will not be doing that again.

Regardless if my monthly goals are met, I will continue to do this blog.

Tomorrow is important

Maybe just to me, but I consider tomorrow to be one of the most important days in my short life. I will explain more in a quick update tomorrow.

I will state, however, that the new book is going very well. I am doing some editing, then I will be publishing it. If all continues at the rate it has been going, look for a release before the new year.

Seizures & Why I Get Them

What happens when I get a seizure? Can I always identify when it will happen and what happens?

Yes and no. There are a few things that happens physically that I notice, but I have become aware to them instead of them intruding heavily in my life.

I get sleepy. That sounds stupid (I am well aware) but it happens randomly and suddenly. I am still a step or two away from finding out why it happens, but I suspect  hypoglycaemia or something in that same vein. The reason I do think that is it only happens when I have not eaten properly for a few hours.

Everything on that point sounds really silly to me when I type it out, but I can assure you: it is a hassle. Think of how often you go an extra hour not eating because you have to finish something or you have company. I pass out.

What am I doing to mitigate the issue? I drink a pop/soda when I start to feel a bit strange. That is usually enough to hold me over until meal time. Otherwise, I am just eating as much as I can, and exercising.

I have only hurt myself once when I fall over. The other night, I must have gone face first into a desk. I came to with a black eye and a bruise/scrape combination on my arm. Otherwise, there has been no effect outside of loosing some time and being horribly disorientated when I wake up.

I have done a little bit of research into what causes seizures. The case that relates most to me is massive cranial trauma. Since the encephalitis was literally my brain crushing itself against my skull, I am going to assume that is the link to why I have seizures. I feel I am allowed to make assumptions because the specialist I saw actually said ‘yeah… we don’t know why you pass out’ (please note that is paraphrased, not a direct quote).

Anywho, I just thought I would fill everyone in with what I know.

SIDE NOTE: I have my next book mostly done. If you would like to read the rough draft, let me know either in the comments below or on my FaceBook.

Journey: Nihilism at its Finest

I should preface this by warning those who care that this will contain spoilers for the game Journey.

Yes: Journey. The game by ‘That Videogame Company’ which came out in 2012. I love everything about this game: The art style. The soundtrack. The narrative.

To those who don’t know or never cared to know, Journey is a game where you direct a nameless, voiceless character from the beginning of a map to the end. The path is full of puzzles and various clues to a past. Nothing is explained, in a tradition sense, and the clues are there for you piece together as time goes on.

It is a simple game in every way. That is what makes it so daunting and stressful at times. I do find that part mildly ironic. I first was introduced to this game by someone who sold me on it by claiming it is relaxing.

Due to the fact there is no narration and little text, the player is taxed with finding the correct path from point to point. You are doing so while trying to complete the task.

What task?

Well, the game does not tell you. Ever. You assume it is important. You assume that it will be explained as time goes on. However, you get to the end and…

Yep.

The game concludes with a cinematic recap of the environments you just tread while the credits roll and beautiful music plays in the background.

It is kind of an anti-climax, but I still found it incredibly satisfying.

You see, I took the game to artistically depict my views on life.

All that matters is now. The events that happen later are, yes, in consequence of what now contains. This does not change the fact that whatever you are feeling now is all that matters.

Journey displays this by telling the player to go on an adventure. One that does not contain any direction except for the walls of the environment. The player has to then endure many difficult trials with NO rhyme or reason except to get to the end. Then, there is end. You die. Well, maybe not DIE, but you do stop existing in the ‘physical’ realm.

The strangest part of this ending was what I felt when I realized what had just happened: I felt accomplished. I felt like everything that needed to be done was done. I had a tonne of fun playing the game, and when it was over, I realized that I could play it again if I wanted to, but there was not that longing to.

That sounds so much worse than I intended it to. I played it again because I WANTED to. Not because the game was taunting me with a ‘maybe’ further play-through. I know I missed secrets on my first play, but my second I knew I was playing as a new character. My previous character was dead, and that was fine.

I cried just as hard the second ending as I did the first. Yes, me, an adult male, cried at the end of basically a cartoon with the bleakest outlook on existence that I have ever seen portrayed in that artistic medium.

Recently, I started following a play-through of someone playing Journey. It had been five years, give or take, since I had played, so of course I was compelled to watch. His commentary was annoying at times, he missed things that I noticed in the background, he went ways that I remembered as being wrong ways, but I will still link as many people as I can to the playlist because I think the game is that important.

To answer the question preemptively: yes, I wept at the end. I wasn’t even embarrassed, even though my dogs were looking at me like I had something wrong with me.

So, why did I open with a bold comparison saying this bleak, beautiful game is anything like nihilism? The game shows that there is no reason for anything we do. Like the game, life is a bunch of attempts at things until something sticks. In the end, it really does not matter what we have done. What does matter is how happy we are at the time.

I will take this opportunity to say that this is a blog, not a direction on how to live. If you are going to take my words to heart, talk it over with someone who understands the direction in which you are taking it. I am just kind of waffling through this post wile I keep my pets away from things they should not eat.

Also, I would like to point out the irony in me saying ‘only now matters! later means nothing!’ as I write this post one week before I post it.

I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD HALLOWE’EN!

Linda

Linda and I have a very uninteresting history. She is the mother of a friend of mine, and she is/was a regular at the music store I managed.

Being a nurse, she took an interest in everything I have gone through. One would think that once I left hospital, however, her interest would wain. That was far from the case, however. She has stayed in my metaphorical corner. Her support has been fantastic. She has shown my book to a few of her co-workers (which I appreciate) and understands my plights from both an educated and friend level.

There really was no point to me writing this other than I was feeling very particularly thankful of her existence when I wrote this. I will not link to her profiles or give her last name (because that is creepy and weird to do without permission) but I hope that everyone has a Linda-type in their life. We all need someone to just be in our corner when we need them.

You’re so vain

I do not know how arrogant this is, but I am listening to an old album while writing my next book. I think (because I cannot bring myself to bullshit) that I am almost done: maybe just a page or two left before editing. I think I am going to name the book “it doesn’t matter” in all lowercase because I am a douche. You would think, in a time of hashtags and trending, that I would write something and name it one word to keep things easy. I am, however, convinced that the aesthetic is fantastic.

Just released the first chapter of the new book recently. I hope you like it!

Just saying.